Global Warming

I don't know if I can, but (I'm going to anyway) I blame air for Global Warming. At first, I didn't want to believe it was capable of such a horrendous thing...At first, I most definitely blamed Al Gore and the secret association of meteorologists that need an excuse for not getting the forecast correct. Since then I've learned that not only did Al Gore invent the Internet, he actually won the presidential election...if you use imaginary numbers. Also meteorologists have to deal with a lot of stuff in their lives. It's not just pointing at a blue/green screen and smiling to the camera and wearing funny outfits. The stress actually causes many to lose their hair (or actually rip it out) and become a 'weather person' whose whole life revolves around their barometer and their 'pet rock' (aka weather rock); which is why if you are looking to be a meteorologist, remember to put BALD in bold type - it's one of the things news stations look for to save their cleaning crews the hassle.

Right, so as I was saying before I so rudely ranted my own opinion like I was writing on a blog or something, it's Air's fault that the World is getting overly warm. I've noticed especially recently a drastic increase in temperature which can ONLY be blamed on Air. It's Air's fault for trapping all those chlorofluorocarbons and for not creating enough ozone...I mean, we're doing our jobs: driving to work in SUVs, buying only processed and singularly packaged foods, cutting down trees to make way for bridges to nowhere, recycling a portion of the plastic that we use, spraying hairspray only in bathrooms where it cannot get to the atmosphere; and what is Air doing? You got it: causing Global Warming.

I, for one, am appalled.